The Loves & Lives of 5 Happy Badaks......: December 2008

Ms.Ponti and I went to the APEX Coffee two nites ago to chill out..........I was on my sober and could-not-be-bothered-with-idiots-mode. So, kira manusia2 di Apex Coffee selamat la......:) As we entered, a young waiter greeted us and asked "Smoking or non smoking section?" And I answered "Smoking please as I would like to start smoking tonite". So there we were seated next to the water feature yang menyamankan mata and tiada orang lain di situ.Bliss......but not for long as after a while, people started to walk in.....hmmmpphhhh...

The same waiter came and asked "would you like the ashtray now?" To which I answered "I don't think so because I forgot to bring the cigar along...." And we laughed like two evil witches except that Ms.Ponti was less evil-ish......

The menus were handed to us and he stood attentively in front of me. I sangat pantang bila I nak baca menu, waiter tercangak depan I like "cepat la order...baca novel ke.....". So, hati sudah sedikit hangat. "We shall call you when we are ready..." Still standing there ma.....tak paham nampaknya tapi I maafkan dia sebab mungkin dia pernah ditrain dalam camp tentera di Spangar Bay supaya attentive at all time........

I wanted the fish and chips, so did Ms.Ponti. So we asked about the coating- breadcrumbs or batter or what.....he seemed lost.....I guess, just like many Malaysian - who cares about the coating......fish & chips is fish & chips la.....hey...I wanna know things that go thru my throat and stay in my cute tummy before depositing it back to the nature as part of it will stick in me for the rest of my happening life........

It took a while for him to comprehend in fact he did not at all so I told Ms.Ponti "neber mind...I have the fish & chips, you eat something else....." I also ordered cheese toast (makanan wajib). After we ordered, he kept on standing close by our table and I felt uneasy as in "tak dak kerja lain ke budak ni"...but neber mind, maybe dia tak pernah jumpa pompuan cunggg macam kami.....:)

When my toast came, it was cheese sandwich instead so I asked and he checked and that was correct. I was unhappy as the last time I was there, it was in a "toast" form and not "sandwich" form........grrrrrrrrr........so, teka....I makan or not???????? and he kept on standing next to our table - like waiting for the sign for me to call him...and every opportunity he had, he would be saying or commenting something to us - in a pleasant way la.......so there I was thinking, budak ni mesti ada education and sedikit cultured la..........just my kind of people........so tak kisah lah dia dok berdiri dekat2 and looking at our table mostly. Ms.Ponti said "maybe waiter kat sini memang attentive or dia takut kat you...ha ha ha...". But I discounted Ms.Ponti's opinion as she is known as "mereng".......ha ha ha......

When the food arrived, it was lovely. So minus the pseudo-toast, it was a great meal after all...ohhh...Ms.Ponti had rice with chicken curry yang reasonably awesome......al-maklumlah, mai dari Yan - kena makan nasi...HA HA HA...........during meal, we talked about stuff - personal issues mainly like whether I should I get married or buy a new car instead, should I travel to New York again and get all the desired designer handbags/shoes or go umrah instead, should I bela more ikan or bela more orang......HA HA HA.......notice: all conversation began with "I".......he he he.......and notice the range of variables.........he he he.........

And all those conversation was with him STILL standing next to our table.......grrrrrr......mat ni pasai apa....suka sangat ke kat kami........again since I was in the "ignore-the-idiots-mode" maka apa-apa je lah labu................

When the cheque came, paid and he came back with the balance and he said this straight to my face...."THANK YOU DR A****". I jumped out of my skin (tapi disebabkan ketebalan kulit ku di tahap dewata, maka tak nampaklah sangat...:) I was dumbfounded, speechless and ternganga - literally........My first thought was, mungkinkah nama ku listed as the first customer but hey I did not give out my name or adakah chain of restaurant in Penang sudah ada list wajah & nama pelanggan GARANG......hehehe........And then it occurred to me that he could be....."Are you my student?" "Yes Dr....Surprise! I took your paper last year and got a C-. Life is full of surprises....But I have moved to the School of Mathematic as Communication is not my interest but I find Maths equally challenging......Life is full of surprises....." Voila!!! Did he spit in my coffee??????? Did he poke my chips with his finger after using the toilet? Did he??? he he he....Patut la sangat attentive dan tidak berganjak dari table ku..................

As we went off with me ternganga and him waving frantically at us from the restaurant, I thanked God that I did not smoke my life away that nite (yeah sure......), was not in my one-of -those-evil-mode and was very considerate about the whole ordering process......Had it not, I might still be ternganga till today......

The morale to be learned is : in Penang, I am always the lecturer, first. The lecturer, second. The lecturer, third. The lecturer - all the time. In Bali, I am the Balinese Queen - forever........ha ha ha.....life is full of surprises indeed - you donno who u gonna bump into or who will be looking at you as their role model or who gonna spit in your coffee ha ha ha............it is not for you to decide..........surprise!!!